“Sad Eyes - Remastered 2002” (Robert John)

Beautiful song. It tells the story of a romantic relationship that clearly wasn’t intended to be a lasting one. It tells the story from the man’s perspective. From the song, we learn that evidently both the man and the woman entered into the relationship with eyes wide-open and that the man expected to eventually go back to another significant other, girlfriend, fiancée, or wife. Now the day that they will part is here and the woman’s sadness is visible on her face and in her eyes. The man is trying to comfort her and reminds her that she knew that this day would come.

Now I question whether the other woman is aware of the relationship. Perhaps she is. It is certainly not unheard of for a couple to agree during a relatively long period of time apart from one another to be free to see other people. And some couples have open relationships or have yet to agree to maintaining a “going steady” relationship. Perhaps the other woman is being cheated upon by the guy. Perhaps not. From the song, it isn’t clear.

I expect that a lot of people would have some strong feelings about both the man and this woman if they both agreed to a relationship when infidelity is involved. And regardless, between two adults of the same age with the expectations established at the beginning, you could argue that both parties are acting as informed participants. The young woman can certainly be sad when the relationship ends and we may be sympathetic. But there is no “bad guy” in the end (again assuming that there is no deception involved and that the guy isn’t cheating on a committed relationship).

But what about if the guy is significantly older and more experienced/mature? I guess that’s where I might be inclined to be a little critical of a guy that knows that his younger partner is clearly getting attached and he allows the relationship to develop perhaps beyond what either ever planned. Granted, she is a consenting adult and has agency. But I still think that an older guy should be a good guy and not just lean on the excuse that she is a consenting adult. That can admittedly be a tough thing to remember and do if he has genuine feelings of affection or even love for the young woman. Like many things in life, things can get complicated or sticky. I didn’t date any women in college that were more than a year or so younger than me, although I did have a couple of younger college women come on to me during my ten-year, on-and-off pursuit of an undergraduate degree. Perhaps, “There but for the grace of God, go I.” I’m no saint.

I heard this song again the other night and I thought of the character of Kat (Annabeth Gish) in the movie, Mystic Pizza. She is a young woman that gets involved with an older, married man. She is clearly intelligent, but not exactly worldly and perhaps not very experienced in the dating world. I don’t want to give too much of the story away, as you would likely enjoy it more if you watch the movie. I guess that it might be considered a “chick flick,” but I thought that it was pretty good.

Below are links to both the song and to the Mystic Pizza trailer. Enjoy the song, check out the trailer, and perhaps watch the movie if it looks interesting to you. The cast has a number of actresses and actors that you will doubtless recognize.

I have a feeling that Mystic Pizza may someday become known for the movie stars it showcased back before they became stars. All of the young actors in this movie have genuine gifts. — Roger Ebert, film critic

“Sad Eyes - Remastered 2002”

https://open.spotify.com/track/3w3rLh6wmne91BS2rwgcog?si=-JKzm_0RRZKg0veMJS81Lg

“Mystic Pizza Official Trailer #1 - Julia Roberts Movie (1988) HD”

https://youtu.be/muLvjpHGHig