Don’t Leave the Game Early

I saw the post above on Facebook and I wanted to share it. I think about the videos that I have watched of family members and friends trying to make sense of a loved one’s suicide and the agony and bewilderment in their eyes and their voices. It is clear in many of these cases that they had no idea that their loved one was considering suicide. Sometimes there were clues, but sometimes there were none or the clues were not readily recognized. Ultimately, like everything else in our lives, we bear the responsibility for our actions. I pray that those that have lost a loved one to suicide find peace. The decision to kill oneself is made by the individual (please keep in mind that I am not excusing or condoning bullying or abuse that has contributed to or directly led to a suicide attempt). That is ultimately where the buck stops.

There have been times that I considered cashing out of the game, but I have experienced and seen so many great things after those dark and lonely times that I consider myself fortunate that I didn’t. Here is a far-from-complete list:

1. new friends (including some canine companions that I love or loved)

2. new loves (and intense cases of “like” 😉)

3. new nephews and nieces

4. new scenery and new sights in new locations

5. new challenges both personal and professional

6. acquiring new skills (e.g., earning a CDL and learning to competently and safely drive an 18-wheeler)

7. Seeing the advent and rise to prominence of personal computers, video games, cellphones/smartphones, the Internet, the Global Positioning System or GPS, drones, etc.

8. the opportunity to play (and lose) a league championship ice hockey game at the PNC Arena (home of the NHL’s Carolina Hurricanes)

9. the opportunity to play baseball at a number of great and unique ballparks including Minor League Baseball parks such as World War Memorial Stadium in Greensboro, NC, the Durham Athletic Park or DAP in Durham, NC, and the Burlington Athletic Stadium in Burlington, NC

10. the 1984 World Series Champion Detroit Tigers

11. the 1997, 1998, 2002, and 2008 Stanley Cup Champion Detroit Red Wings

12. the 2006 Stanley Cup Champion (and 2002 Stanley Cup Runner-Up) Carolina Hurricanes

13. two Triple Crown of Thoroughbred Racing winning runs (American Pharoah in 2015 and Justify in 2018)

14. the 2016 World Series Champion Chicago Cubs

15. the television series Archer (It is one of the funniest, most intelligent shows on television.)

16. The Peanuts Movie (I saw Snoopy Come Home in the theater when I was much younger.)

17. The era of the space shuttle program and what appears to be the dawn of commercial and private spaceflight and space exploration

I can’t claim to understand anyone’s unique circumstances or situation. I can’t claim to hold any special insight into anyone’s trials and tribulations. I am fairly certain however that even the most solitary and reclusive person that goes online and perhaps goes on social media would be missed by someone. Regardless, if you take your own life you are guaranteed to miss out on a number of experiences and encounters. That is a given.

It's a hell of a thing, killin' a man. You take away all he's got and all he's ever gonna have. — Clint Eastwood as Will Munny in Unforgiven

I also know that no one else has seen and experienced what you have seen and experienced. Sometimes I get caught up in vivid memories of something from my past and I think that it is somewhat sad that I can’t adequately share that vivid recollection with others.

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off shoulder of Orion. I watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. — Rutger Hauer as Roy Batty in Blade Runner

For yourself and those that care for you, please reconsider leaving the game of life of your own accord. Leave that decision to that great manager in the sky. And if I someday ever reach the point where I cannot heed my own advice on this topic, please forgive me for the hurt that I have caused you and know that there was nothing that you could do and nothing that you did or didn’t do that was responsible for my decision.