A Calming Touch and Presence
Updated: Dec 20, 2024
I don't believe in so-called "toxic masculinity." There are good men, bad or "toxic" men, and perhaps some less-bad men trying to decide who they are and what they want to be. Traditional masculinity, however, is not "toxic."
A man is ultimately responsible for taming the raging beast within (assuming that he harbors such a raging beast within himself to any great degree in the first place) and hopefully becoming a decent, kind, and loving man that contributes to his community (or at least doesn't burn it to the ground). Yet, I know that many a man has been helped along on that journey by a good woman or by his singleminded pursuit of such a good woman. Granted, many wild men have stymied the best efforts of a good woman to tame their inner demons, but history has shown that women often make us men better than we might be inclined to be if left to our own devices and affairs.
I think of Clint Eastwood's Will Munny in the movie Unforgiven, a "...known thief and murderer, a man of notoriously vicious and intemperate disposition" that turned over a new leaf and became a responsible husband and father due to the loving and civilizing influences of his wife. A fictional example to be sure, but based upon the fact that women have indeed proven to act as a civilizing force in a culture and in a family. I also think of Gary Cooper's Alvin C. York in the movie Sergeant York, a violent hurricane of a man that, while compelled to repent and accept God by a lightening strike that stopped him on a mission of vengeance, was also helped along on his journey of redemption by Joan Leslie's Gracie Williams and Margaret Wycherley's Mother York.
As I noted in a previous post (https://gregorymaness.wixsite.com/website/post/a-good-influence), I believe that I was fortunate enough to meet a good, young woman that certainly helped me reign in at least some of my own wildness and personal demons. To be truly honest, I had been a bit on the warpath up to the point that we met following a failed relationship that didn't exactly leave me feeling warm and fuzzy. So I have some firsthand experience with what it can be like having a calming influence of the female persuasion. I didn't always hit the mark, but I did want to be a better man.
Anyway, I saw the drawing above on Twitter and it spoke to me. So, of course, I decided to share it with anyone that might happen across my humble blog.
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